Sunday, March 30, 2008

The Place We're At

I haven't written much about Nathan or my family on here lately, so I thought I might give an update.

As I write, he is still in the county jail, and he has no hope of returning home at this time. He will go from there to prison, and that is the hard reality he is facing. Oddly enough, we are all dealing with this pretty well. Don't get me wrong, every time I look at his Kitchen Aid mixer on my counter, I get a certain feeling of sadness. But day to day life is easier than I thought it would be.

Currently, the offer from the DA is 20 years, to include 5 years from his juvenile history. This is an 85% crime, meaning he would have to complete around 17 years of his sentence. No early release for good behavior. We are all hoping that this offer will come down, but at this point there is no telling. Nathan has a public defender, and...well...hmm...we get very limited amounts of her time. His juvenile attorney still helps us so much, and works behind the scene whenever he can. We will never be able to tell him how much he has meant to us. He has helped navigate us through all the legal terminology and workings, and for that he is an angel.

My mom sold her house and is set to close on April 11th. She will be moving in with us on April 5th. She is excited about this, as she is so lonely in her house. Her house has had very little going on in it for the last few months. It is not the plan she had for herself, but after $20,000 in legal fees, if she ever hopes to get the house in the back built, this is how it has to be. It is funny though, because we all still need each other right now, and it feels right to have her close.

I talk to Nathan three times a week and visit him on Saturdays. We are actually closer now than we have ever been. He has to be truthful, and for once he answers questions my mother and I ask him. Over the years I think he will learn a lot about himself, and the best we can hope for him is that he grows, and chooses to be the best man he can be.

He told me the other day that his cellie (cell mate), told him that he pictured God looking over Nathan's life plan, saying"...uh huh, yes, OK I like that, wait...what the...oh no... oh hell no...", and put his ass in a big time out.
I like to think that's true.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

What a bittersweet blog. It is good to hear that you and the family are doing well and are dealing with the hand you have been dealt with an amazing show of strength and solidarity. However, it is sad that it took Nathan going to jail/prison to find himself and the man that he will be. Your family was already strong before this all happened but now you are showing it to the nth degree. I know that you think about him daily because I think about him regularly too. I know he doesn't care about "Satan", as he so fondly called me this last few years, but please tell him I am thinking about him and hope he remains as strong as he can in his current situation. I love that your mom is moving in with you and that it feels right for you and her!! You know I would straight kill my momma if she moved in with me!! =) Anyway, don't ever hesitate to ask for help, whether it be for hard labor or just for a night out. I love ya, love ya, love ya!!!!!

The Mossmans said...

I have been amazed at how well you and your entire family have weathered this storm. While I know you want to control the situation, you can't. But, as you have already said, your family is growing closer and that is a bright spot in this dark time. Just remember we all love you (and your family!) and we're always here to listen or talk. I think we would also be happier if you blogged more. :)