Slime Dog Gene

After having dinner with some of my girlfriends on Friday, what I already knew about men, was confirmed. All men, and I say all, are alike. We had the conversation, yes, the ever famous male-bashing conversation, that all women have about their husbands. However, let it be known, this blog entry will not be about how bad men can be, but rather a little insight as to why they have their bad, bad ways.
Alma, a very wise woman, once told me that all males are born with The Slime Dog gene. She told me about this one day at VZD's after too many beers, but took it very seriously, and made me promise that should I ever, ever share my secret knowledge, I be sure to give her credit for naming and finding a, yet-to-be scientificly discovered, male gene.
They can't stop it. They don't ask for it. They just get it. Gay men, straight men, old men and young men are afflicted. It's a little door prize male babies collect on the way out of the womb. As they exit their mamma's body they are told, "This prize gene will be the best thing you will get for the rest of your life. It will anger many women, but it will bring you much happiness. It is capable of great things. When you are a grown man you will not be responsible for knowing where things like vacuum cleaners and spatulas' are kept in your home. When you are a young and single you will not be responsible for drinking too much and sleeping with too many women. It's yours to use when you're 60, and buy a sports car, and make vulgar eye contact with, much-too-young -for-you, women. Females world wide will just look away, shake their heads and know, it's The Slime Dog Gene, you can't help it. So young man, take this Slime Dog Gene and use it well."

-