Still Here
To the many of you that know me, you are well aware that the last three or more months of my life have been a roller coaster. My once ill-conceived, happily-ever-after, exsistance has become a rated R, grade B movie. Chocked full of cussing, crying, visits to the Oklahoma County jail, police searches, and, just like a grade B movie, lots of money being spent for not so good outcomes. The events that have unfolded before me are overwhelming. This is hard, this is very hard. My brother has found himself in trouble. The boy I thought knew has become someone I am just learning about. He is someone I loved before all of this, and he is someone I will continue to love through all of this. He is so young, yet he faces charges and decisions that even the oldest, wisest person would break under. As a family we are attempting to understand and cope. Yesterday was a dark day for us. Please bear with me through this most difficult time, and know that I will return to normal again, even if that normal is just a little different than before.
4 comments:
Just know this girlie- you are loved by all of us and if there is anything we can do for you all to help you through this trying time we will probably fight each other to do it!
Love you!
I am so sorry to know you are going through such a hard time. When my dad lost his job in that whole ugly mess he went through, and I would see him on t.v. and people saying he should be indicted for child abuse, it sent everything off balance. I thought up until them that my life, my family, myself, were all "normal", and that was the first time I realized we're not. I don't think in big life changes you ever go back to being or feeling "normal" that you ever find the same balance. Cosmic weights shifts, and you find an all new balance that one day, hopefully, you can come to accept and live with. You, your brother, your mother, are all in my thoughts and prayers, and know you can talk (or blog) to open ears and hearts.
Since I have known that boy since he was in diapers, I feel a since of "sisterhood" to him and can't seem to get the whole thing out of my head. Just know that whatever the outcome is, you, your family and especially my Nate are still loved and kept close to my heart. You all will be okay in the end, maybe not "normal" per se, but that is how we all learn and grow in life. I love you and your fam so much and am simply sorry that you are all going through this. Keep your head up and if you want to talk about nothing, call me. If you want to talk about something, call me. I will do anything for you and whenever you need me I'll be there. (I sound like a corny love song...)I am not the adept writer that you are but my words really seem to be failing the sentiment that I want to express here. Please tell your bro that he still has a very strong support system that loves him and adores him and so he too, will make it through these dark days. I love you baby!!!
I wish there was something, anything I could do to help you through this sh***y time. It's gotta be so hard for you and everyone in your family. Bring those cute kids to my house for some chatting!
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